How Can I Stop My Ex from Turning My Child Against Me
How to Determine if Your Ex-Spouse is Attempting to Turn Your Child Against You
This is a question I receive all the time. Parental Alienation is a frustrating situation. It happens so quickly. One day, you and your child are getting along as wonderfully as you always have. Then it seems like overnight they reject you, fear you and want nothing to do with you. You scan the previous days, weeks and months for a clue as to what happened. Did you say something that offended them? Did you do something that caused them to no longer want to see you? Was there a situation that has led them to fear you? With each question, you come up dry. So, what is going on?
The term Parental Alienation was first defined by Dr. Richard Gardner in his 1985 article, Recent Trends in Divorce and Custody Litigation. Dr. Gardner had a long-time history of working with child custody cases. While very basic in his early assessment, he observed children denigrating one parent while aligning themselves with another one. His study led him to further observe eight characteristics or symptoms that appear in a consistent manner. Since his study, clinicians have used those characteristics as benchmarks for alienation.
If you are involved in a high conflict divorce or your spouse has become contentious, post-divorce, you could be experiencing parental alienation. It’s difficult to believe that your spouse or ex-spouse would try to turn, or has already turned, your child or children against you. It is an unfathomable thing to do but, as a Certified Divorce Coach who specializes in Parental Alienation, I see this happen with frequency.
What Can You Do About Parental Alienation?
Parental Alienation is a complex situation; one that does not have a quick fix. That is because your ex-spouse is vehemently entrenched in keeping your child from you and will do whatever it takes to do so AND at the expense of your child. Please keep in mind that Parental Alienation is not a mistake. It does not “just happen.” Parental Alienation is a calculated attempt to destroy the relationship between you and your child.
It would be a disservice to you if I gave you a platitude answer on how to confront parental alienation: a quick answer and sent you on your way. The reason is that your situation is unique and there are so many factors to consider such as the age of your child, how long the alienation has been going on, do you have any contact with your child and if you have had any legal intervention regarding parental alienation.
To help you and others like you, going through this nightmare, I have developed a four-week group, that meets on Wednesdays from 7:00 to 8:30 PM. EST to understand Parental Alienation, why it happens, how it happens and ways you can diffuse Parental Alienation if not combat it altogether. This group enables you to communicate with others who are living through this nightmare. Aside from our weekly meetings, you have access to a private Facebook group that I visit daily with comments and suggestions. You will be able to stay within the group long beyond the end of the four-week group.
I Understand Because I, Too, Was a Targeted Parent
You are probably exhausted, frustrated and downright scared. I know firsthand how it feels to be helpless as your beloved child rejects you and you have no idea why. I am the first person to tell you that you did not do anything wrong. There is a force that is working against you and you need the tools to fight back. During my course, I will explain why people alienate their children and how you take the steps to diffuse it. No one can change the alienator’s behavior but, I can give you the arsenal to fight this war and it is a war! A war waged against you and the child is the weapon.
Sign up now for our April 1st group. Don’t allow Parental Alienation to destroy you, your child and your family. If you are on-the-fence whether this Pass on Parental Alienation course can help you, sign up for a free 20-minute chat with me to discuss your particular situation. I look forward to meeting you to discuss the ways you can create your own force against Parental Alienation.
Your friend in combating Parental Alienation.
Parental Alienation Is Complex
As someone who has defied Parental Alienation, I know that there is a lot to understand and consider if you’re dealing with it. Along with my Pass on Parental Alienation course, as a Parental Alienation Specialist, I provide telephone coaching sessions for parents as well as training and speaking engagements for attorneys and therapists about parental alienation cases.
For more information about what Parental Alienation looks like, watch my TEDx below.